Parrot or gun?

jasonk282

Banned
Well I know I'M scared of him! That's FOR SURE! :eek:































*ahem* not.

I would be if he can;t shoot you he might just unleast his jerhi curls juice on you.
 
I would be if he can;t shoot you he might just unleast his jerhi curls juice on you.

Hey! That shit's slippery, sir! One wring of his hair and he could have self-made lawsuits against grocery stores across the globe! Fuck the AK, that's just a distraction to throw the ATF on a wild goose chase! The REAL weapon in that picture isn't the gun. It isn't the parrot. It isn't the freaky-looking lady. It's the hair, sir. It's the hair. :eek:
 
Anything I might have read?

Not likely, it didn't make Oprah's list.

Actually, my best writing is not my fiction, but it is about Germanic Modernist trends in composition in fin de siecle Austria. Especially when that trend made it to


:sleep:


see? Even I don't like my own writing.
 
Not likely, it didn't make Oprah's list.

Actually, my best writing is not my fiction, but it is about Germanic Modernist trends in composition in fin de siecle Austria. Especially when that trend made it to


:sleep:


see? Even I don't like my own writing.

So THAT's what you do when you're not out lurking in places!! :D
 
Not likely, it didn't make Oprah's list.

Actually, my best writing is not my fiction, but it is about Germanic Modernist trends in composition in fin de siecle Austria. Especially when that trend made it to


:sleep:


see? Even I don't like my own writing.

:1orglaugh Ah, alright.

It didn't make the Oprah list, but did it make the Richard & Judy list? :D

I still probably wouldn't have read it, but at least the cultural difference would be accounted for.
 
:1orglaugh Ah, alright.

It didn't make the Oprah list, but did it make the Richard & Judy list? :D

I still probably wouldn't have read it, but at least the cultural difference would be accounted for.

No, but I think Donny and Marie Osmond talked about it! :1orglaugh
 
:1orglaugh Ah, alright.

It didn't make the Oprah list, but did it make the Richard & Judy list? :D

I still probably wouldn't have read it, but at least the cultural difference would be accounted for.

Frankly, I don't think it made any list. Sorry to be culturally insensitive, you wanker.

So THAT's what you do when you're not out lurking in places!! :D

Right. When not lurking, I'm writing amazing books and articles. Combine the two, and you have a very creepy professor.
 

StanScratch

My Penis Is Dancing!
Shall I call you Watson from now on?

Actually I've done it too. Not so big a thrill, really...

I'm going to! I have one written (I mean written like in PEN), and one I want to write...

Anything I might have read?



I doubt it. If you were one of the poor souls to have seen 2012, Cusack's character wrote a book which had sold about 500 copies. That is quite a bit more than I sold.
I've also got some short stories on a failed program at amazon.com called "amazonshorts". I think maybe five people bought any of those.
 
I doubt it. If you were one of the poor souls to have seen 2012, Cusack's character wrote a book which had sold about 500 copies. That is quite a bit more than I sold.
I've also got some short stories on a failed program at amazon.com called "amazonshorts". I think maybe five people bought any of those.

How much is your book? I'll buy it just so I can say, "My friend wrote this!! So leave the GODDAMN ROOM before you say it sucks!! :mad:"

Just kidding about the room, part! :D But I would like to buy your book because we're friends! Just remember to buy mine when they come out, sir! :dunno:
 
I doubt it. If you were one of the poor souls to have seen 2012, Cusack's character wrote a book which had sold about 500 copies. That is quite a bit more than I sold.
I've also got some short stories on a failed program at amazon.com called "amazonshorts". I think maybe five people bought any of those.

That's a shame.

But your name has a bit of weight behind it now. Set up shop somewhere around here. :D
 
"Freeze, motherfucker!"
"OK, OK, here's my wallet, I don't want any...wait..."
"Don't make me do it! I'll blow your fucking head off!"
"No...uh...wait...are you pointing a parrot at me?'
"Um. No."
"Yes. Yes you are. You are holding a parrot in your hand."
"NO I'm not! It's a gun, and I'm not afraid to use it!"
"It's a parrot, dude. And your hands are trembling like hell."
"Are not."
"Are too. You're shaking like Lady Gaga getting fucked by that Stan Scratch stud."
"No...this is a fucking gun! And I've about had it! You have until the count of five!"
"Dude, listen, it's a parrot. I can tell. I see the beak..."
"FIVE!"
"I see the feathers. It's got fucking green feathers."
"FOUR!"
"Guns don't have feathers."
"Do too! THREE!"
"Look, it just nibbled it's foot. How many guns do you know that have the ability to do that?"
"TWO!"
Squawk
"Come off it, now! It just squawked! How do you explain that?"
"I was cocking the gun. That was a cock."
"Hehe. You said...no, wait...seriously, it's a fucking bird. I mean, look, it just shit on your hand!"
"That's gun powder."
"Bullshit! You are trying to rob me with a fucking bird. You know what I think? I think you fucked up, dude. You were in a hurry when you left home this morning and grabbed the bird by mistake. Somewhere, there is an Ornithologist with a gun trying to figure out why her bird keeps putting bullet holes in the other animals. Come on, dude. Admit it. You fucked up."
"Did not."
"Yes, I think you..."
Polly wants a cracker
"That...that's the sound of the bullet going into the chamber!"
"Dude, you're fucking pathetic."
BANG
"You fucker! You shot me! You shot me with your fucking bird!"
"Told you."
"Ah, but now, the shoe is on the other foot, for I have a fully loaded muskrat in my pocket! Bwahahahaha!"

OMFG! Stan your post was great! :rofl:

There is no way to add to this post after that genius!
 
Top